The Best Advice I've Ever Received

Sometimes, people give me advice when I don't ask for it. We've all had that experience, right? I'm going about my business, I share something about my life, and bam! Advice! How I should be living my life or things I need to do to right what is clearly wrong with me. 

Sometimes, it's bad advice. Sometimes, it's really bad actually. An example: being told I just need to find little ways to cheer up when I have postpartum depression is very bad advice. 

However, sometimes people give really good advice. Like really good advice. I thought I'd gather up the best advice I've ever received and share it. 

1. "You make mistakes and you learn. Otherwise, how will you know what to do in the future?"

The only reason I know right from wrong, really, is because I've done wrong in the past and learned from it. When my mom was driving me to the hospital to be induced, she told me this: "you're going to make mistakes." It's really freeing to be told that and to go forward with it: to know that I was going to do things the wrong way for Forrest, but that ultimately, it will be okay. I can make mistakes, and then I can move forward with new information to do better next time. 

2. Use Psychology Today to find a therapist or counselor. 

This is a piece of advice I actually got from a true crime/murder podcast. Seriously, I'm not joking. One of the best things I've learned from my favorite podcast, My Favorite Murder, is PsychologyToday. It's an easy way to find therapists and counselors in your area. For me, the process of finding a new, or available, counselor is super overwhelming--but it's so easy to just search online. Best piece of advice I've ever gotten from Karen and Georgia--besides staying sexy and not getting murdered. 

3. You don't know what you don't know.

This is another piece of advice from a podcast. I started listening to Food Psych, a podcast about body positivity, body image, and eating disorders. "You don't know what you don't know" is a phrase that's often repeated. Sometimes, when people talk about their food issues, it goes back to childhood--I know it does for me too. This can have a number of problems including: 1) making your parents feel guilty for things they did (like not letting you eat sugar during the week), 2) making you become paranoid about the choices you make for your child, and 3) making you feel like it's your parents fault. Realistically, though, Christy, the woman behind Food Psych, always says, "You don't know what you don't know." Your parents did the best they could with the information they had, basically, and unless they were being purposefully abusive, which is rarely, it's not something that you can consider faulty. Eventually, you have to let go of being afraid or feeling blameful and accept that you don't know what you don't know--but once you do, you can do better. 

What's the best piece of advice you've ever received?

I'm An Adult & I Love Disneyland

C'mon, admit it, you love Disneyland too!

I'm not weird. You're weird. Who doesn't love Disneyland? 

Ok. Whatever. I guess some people don't like Disneyland and I'm not saying you're abnormal or joyless... but... yeah. 

Just kidding. To each their own. Which is why I take extreme joy in Disneyland. I mean, it's kind of everything I love: chocolate covered pineapple skewers? Check! Giant rice crispies? Yup. Pretzels? Aw yeah, fast food Bavarian style. Semi-spooky, cutesy stuff? In droves. 

I'm an adult and I refuse to stop enjoying Disneyland. 

It's picturesque! I mean, look, that's a place you want to visit, right? Just kidding, it will never be this empty. 

Actual words I have said to my husband: "It's ok to like stuff just for the sake of it, Danny." I said this half in jest, but half serious too. Sometimes, I feel like we're all trying so hard to be cool and hip and fun that we let that get in the way of genuinely enjoying stuff. Sometimes, it's ok to like stuff just because you do. You don't need an explanation for it. 

There is a reason we all kinda love pop songs (or at least why they get stuck in our heads so easily). There is a reason that fast food tastes amazing to 85%+ of the population. There is a reason why a majority of people enjoy Disneyland vacations (even if they might not want to repeat them over and over again). It's because some things are just designed for mass enjoyment. And if you enjoy those things, it doesn't mean you're a stupid sell out. It means you're a human with ears that can hear reasonably well, taste buds that enjoy fat and salt in high amounts, and a person that was once a child who watched an Aladdin sing-a-long tape at least twice a day. (Maybe only me on that last one.) 

Even Walt looks happy to be there! 

Disneyland is the fast food of travel. It's easy. Everyone thinks it's cheaper than it is, but it's actually kind of stupid expensive. (Fast food adds up, y'all!) There is a pre-determined menu and not a lot of leeway. You go to Disneyland. You stay in a hotel. You stand in lines. You maybe get frustrated. You eat a churro. You feel like you ate a brick for the rest of the day. 

What's not to love about that? 

Here's the thing: in the wrong environment, Disneyland can totally be a nightmare. If you go into Disneyland saying that you hate lines, that you hope it's not crowded, that crowds make you miserable, etc., etc., you're basically setting the stage to be miserable. I hate to break this to you, but here's the big secret: it's freaking Disneyland. There are always going to be lines. There are always going to be other people. It's freaking Disneyland. You're not walking to the park. 

If you approach Disneyland with the idea that you're there to have fun -- and dammit, you're gonna have fun no matter what happens -- then undoubtedly you will have fun. If you, like me, walk into the parks just overjoyed to be there, then you're going to enjoy yourself. Half the fun is just being at Disneyland. Everything is themed and organized and clean and perfect (this is my dream world, clearly); how can you not at least enjoy it? 

lol @ all of these pictures featuring empty walkways. 

Lots of people don't like Disneyland. Ok, that's fine, you do you, yo! I'm sure you enjoy lots of other stuff that people might find embarrassing, like scream-cry-singing to Taylor Swift in your car or putting sriracha sauce on everything even though it tastes like nothing (I went there, bring it). Do I judge you for that? Yes, a little, but I'll stop if you'll stop judging me for being an adult who loves Disneyland.

It's ok to be an adult who loves Disneyland. It is. It's ok. It's ok to cry to Taylor Swift songs in your car, eat too much hot sauce, make stale jokes about bacon, eat fast food, buy a mass-produced sweater, and go to Disneyland. It's okay to enjoy things just because you enjoy them.