Am I Crazy to Attempt NaNoWriMo with a Newborn Baby?

A few weeks ago, I decided to take on a small research project. By that I mean, I decided to Google something. This is actually something I do several times a day. Usually, I search for something that, without context, seems bizarre, such as “28 weeks baby kicks seem fainter?” And then, of course, I read one link, begin to panic, and retreat into the cocoon of my bed until Forrest, undoubtedly, begins to assault my insides as retribution for worrying about him. 

However, this Google search was different. I searched, in this exact wording, “NaNoWriMo with newborn baby.” 

If I expected to get an in-depth blog post about taking on NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month, a project that I’ve taken on every November for 5 years), I was mistaken. Three pages of results gave articles about “nurturing your newborn, baby novel” and lots of stuff that anthropomorphized novels into newborn babies. Basically, weird stuff and nothing related to actually trying to write a novel, in a month, about 1-2 weeks after giving birth. 

I was disappointed, so I gave up, got in bed, and took a nap. AKA the usual. 

I decided not to think about NaNoWriMo for a while. After all, November is a long ways away! Seriously, a long time! I laughed to myself as I thought about it. November is, basically, like 6 months away. Lightyears. It is lightyears away at this point. 

Then, I realized, with a shocking revelation, that my due date is in 12 weeks. Less than 12 weeks now. 11 weeks. 11 weeks. I remember being 11 weeks pregnant. How did I get to 28, 29 weeks?? How did this happen?? 

So, I hit Google again. This time, I thought of ways I could augment my search to cut out the weird, treat-your-writing-like-a-baby articles. (This, to be honest, is a pet peeve of mine. A novel is not a baby; it is a lump of words that you put on the page. It’s not living and breathing. If it’s driving you nuts, you need to take a few deep breaths and chill. Also, the use of “baby” alongside “novel” without actually talking about a baby makes it hard for people who are carrying around babies inside of them to find actual information for their actual situations.)

Anyway, I searched for: “NaNoWriMo with a baby”, “NaNoWriMo with kids”, and “NaNoWriMo post-baby.” I got, across the board, almost the exact same results as before (“Why your NaNoWriMo novel is like your least favorite kid” and “Getting your NaNoWriMo baby to behave” are two truly bizarre 5th+ page Google results). However, I did find a few baby-related (real baby, I mean) NaNoWriMo articles and one interesting blog post. 

But absolutely none of them talked about attempting NaNoWriMo with a newborn. With a 6-month-old, with a 1-year-old, with two toddlers, with twin toddlers, etc., yes. But newborns? No. 

This, of course, leads me to believe that most people think I’m absolutely nuts for even attempting NaNoWriMo with a newborn baby. 

If Forrest is born exactly on his due date (which is unlikely, although possible), he will be 8 days old on November 1, aka the start date of NaNoWriMo. If he is born early, he might be 2 weeks old by then. If he is born late, he might only be 4 days old or less or more. Or he could not even be born yet, if he really decides to make my life hard. There are a multitudes of possibilities when it comes to "what my life will be like in November" and I can't predict any of them. 

With all that being said though... I find myself still wanting to try NaNoWriMo. My mom keeps reassuring me that, despite what everyone says, I will have spare time once the baby comes. I will have time to eat and take a quick shower, get work done and cook. Not as much time as right now, mind you, but I won't be losing it immediately. That means in November, I will probably have at least some downtime to dedicate to myself, to staying creative. And who knows, maybe having a baby will inspire me in ways I never expected! 

I'm someone who, very often, relies on the experiences of others to calm my fears. In many ways, this is one of the benefits of the internet. Whenever I'm experiencing a particularly bizarre pregnancy symptoms (strange taste in mouth, pain in my right side, spotting, whatever), I can Google it and find 100 different accounts of what it could be, or how normal it its, or whatever. It's comforting, really. 

So, to have no accounts of a new mom taking on NaNoWriMo is terrifying because it means I'll be embarking on my journey with no past experiences to calm me down or tell me how it will go. It could go fine, like any other year that I've completed a novel. Or it could be awful, a stressful waste of time that makes me feel cranky and silly and dumb, a 1/4-finished novel on my computer and no pretty certificate to print.

I'm willing to take one for the team though. I'm willing to be the first... if only so I can write about it and tell the world, one way or another, if it really is crazy. 

Can We Still Call It Fashion Blogging When All You Write About is Shopping?

Back when I maintained what I tentatively referred to as a fashion blog--was I always lifestyle or something? I don't know--I prided myself on the fact that, most of the time, I wore the same items over and over. To me, that's true of anyone who is fashionable or stylish in a real day-to-day setting. My outfits often featured the same belts, scarves, dresses, and shoes worn in interchangeable ways, which was easy for me and my budget.

As I scroll through my feedly or Bloglovin these days (why do I have two readers?), I notice more and more that all fashion bloggers seem to have one thing in common: they almost never wear something twice. And often, a series of blogs will feature the exact same dress on the exact same day--and of course, they received it for free.

And even if the same bloggers have received the same item at the same time (and inexplicably all posted about it on the same day), none of them style it any differently. A dress paired with nude heels and a white clutch... over and over and over as I scroll through blogs. It's not even aspirational. A cheap dress from ModCloth or Nordstrom is still just a cheap dress if you don't show me how to, I don't know, dress it up for work or dress it down for a BBQ or how to transition it to cooler months. What's the point? 

The element of personal style seems to have been removed from fashion blogging as it becomes more monetized. I'm not one of those people to say that "blogging is dying," but the monetization of more personality-based niche blogs seems to be harming the creativity and ingenuity of those blogs. As well, more and more people seem to be getting into blogging as an "easy fix"--a ready-made career where you can get free clothes with minimal effort. 

The more I thought about this, the more I realized it really bothered me how homogenous and boring the "big" blogs had become. At the same time, the blogs I'd loved (and that had stayed unique through the years) were floundering: they received less and less good deals and all seemed to be embarking on a personal crisis (which, Lord knows, I'd been there too). Then, one day, Danny said something that made me realize what was going on. He said, "It's not really fashion blogging though, is it? It's just a shopping blog for all the stuff they buy." And... he's not wrong, really. 

Sadly, fashion blogging has become more about acquisition.

I've written about this in regards to scrapbooking. The community seems to more about constantly buying, buying, buying new (admittedly cute) stuff, and less about tutorials or demonstrations to use said stuff. This is seen in haul videos and posts, in empties videos and posts, and outfit posts. 

If your blog is mostly just about shopping (no matter what you're shopping for), isn't it just a shopping blog, a blog to write about all the things you constantly acquire? If you don't write or demonstrate how to use them, how to remix them, how to implement anything in a way beyond simply having it... really, what's the point of labeling a fashion blog or a scrapbooking blog or a beauty blog anything other than a shopping blog? 

I think this is a frustration that lots of blog readers are having. You see this mostly in communities like Get Off My Internets. Whether you agree with the premise of an anonymous community where people can complain about bloggers or not, GOMI represents some of the common critiques and attitudes about blogs: who cares about one woman buying a bunch of crap she simply doesn't really need and never doing anything with it? The number of fashion, beauty, and lifestyle bloggers that ultimately get labeled with "shopping addict" is astounding. Truth be told, it's most of them... and I don't think that label is necessarily wrong in a vast majority of cases. 

Blogging isn't an art that is dying. There are lots of interesting blogs not related to fashion, beauty, or lifestyle that don't get pulled into the consumerist obsession with constant shopping. And obviously, those types of blogs are still very profitable: the number of women earning a decent living (or at least enough to supplement another income) off a fashion, beauty, or lifestyle blog is still very high. And really, that's one of the coolest parts of niche blogging, the fact that so many women have made careers for themselves out of it. 

I do wonder, however, what the answer is. Will niche lifestyle blogs ever snap back into what they once were? As long as interest from big brands exists (and there is an outlet for them to promote using sponsored blog posts and courtesy-of clothing), many blogs will remain in the rut of "shopping exclusively." But I hope that someday the blogs of the past will emerge: great outfit posts, great make up tutorials, and great DIY posts that are only about sharing great content and advice, not appeasing a sponsor. 

My Pre-Baby Wishlist

Are wish list blog posts annoying? Maybe. But I've always liked them. It's kind of fun to see the other things that people search for on the Internet, or what they want for their birthday or just because. Doing them too often can be annoying because at a certain point, coveting stuff all the time is kind of concerning. But once and a while, a wish list blog post is fun. 

And this one is one really, long pointed stare at my husband. I've never been really obsessive about trying to get him to get me specific things for my birthday or our anniversary, but I've been making a really big deal about the things I want for the last months of my pregnancy. These aren't necessarily things I want for my birthday, because my birthday is October 20 and my due date is October 23. Waiting until potentially 3 days before giving birth to enjoy some new stuff seems like a recipe for disaster. 

Here are my (super duper basic) wishes for the last few months of my pregnancy. 

1. Striped Top

Guys, we need to talk about how much I want a black and white striped top. (I have an image in my head of it being majority white with thin, wide set black stripes.) Ideally, it wouldn't be maternity so that I could hopefully wash and shrink it down to post-bump status. If you're wondering why I'm jonesing for a relatively basic top so much, see my Maternity Style Pinterest board. It's the perfect Fall wardrobe addition (and it won't be too small like the striped top I own currently). 

2. Knee High Boots

For the past few years, I've operated under the assumption that I have "wide calves." But I actually, kind of don't? My calves have a circumference of 14 inches. Which, sounds huge, but is actually fairly typical. The average size 8 pair of boots has a circumference of 15-17 inches. Should work out, right? Wrong! Because I've never worn a size 8 boot in my life! I've always worn children's boots (size 4-ish and they have a calf circumference of... about 10-12 inches) or a size 6 (that typically has a calf circumference of about 12-13 inches). The size of the boot is correlated to the circumference of the calf... so if you're like me and have fairly standard size calves (or perhaps even muscular for your body type), but have always worn an itty bitty shoe size, you've never been able to find knee high boots that fit. 

With this knowledge, and puffy feet, I feel like the time has arrived: I can buy size 8 or 8.5 size boots and have them fit my calves and my feet (with thick socks). I've been scoping out boots for the last two months and I'm still undecided. I want to see them in person, I decide, and then I'll find a great pair of Mukluks on Zulily or something. 

3. A Knit Scarf

It's warm. It's cozy. It doubles as a nursing cover. It goes with every outfit. This year, I want a blanket scarf pre-Fall (so I avoid the massive sell out run on them!) and a really nice, knitted infinity scarf. 

4. Naked Smoky Palette

When I heard that Urban Decay was releasing a third (!!!) Naked palette, I had the immediate thought that they were jumping the shark. And I was wrong because the Naked Smokey palette is gorgeous. (I actually really love the Naked 3 palette as well because I loooove rose gold eye shadows, but I always look like I've got a bad case of pink eye when I pair pink-y eyeshadows with my hazel eyes.) 

5. An iMac

This is the most "dream worthy" gift I want. Someone needs to get me an iMac though. My trusty MacBook is starting to slow down and gets a little bit more laggy everyday. I've had it since my senior year of college--that's 5 years of use! I'm ready to graduate to a desktop computer and use my MacBook as a "use around the house" device. 

All the Things I Just Can't Wait For

Sometimes, I worry that I sound too disappointed when I talk about having a boy. As I've written before, my disappointment is not really "this is a disappointment" and more "that was not what I expected." I'm less disappointed, actually, and more sad. When my friend from college, Bek, was visiting, I managed to convey just why I wanted a little girl so bad: I love my mom. That's it, pure and simple. I love my mom; I talk to hear at least once a day by text and visit her as much as I can. I love our relationship. I love that when I was 14 and just about to go into high school, she took me shopping and told me, in no uncertain terms, that I was beautiful and would always be successful because I was smart and that I would really enjoy high school. (That last bit was wishful thinking for both of us.) I love going to Portland with her, running errands, looking through old photos. I love my mom. And I wanted a little girl so I could have the same kind of relationship, because the relationship between mothers and daughters is vastly different from that between mothers and sons. 

I realize now, after a lot of time having passed between finding out little Forrest's gender and now, that that kind of expectation can be really damaging. By trying to force a certain kind of relationship on my child and I, I would undoubtedly be disappointed over and over again. I don't know what Forrest will be like and, even if he was a girl, I have no idea if we would connect and bond the exact same way my mother and I do. 

Thanks to the relationship between my mother and I, I know exactly how to be a great mother to a daughter: I know the things I want to say and the things I don't want to say; I know what to do, how to act, how to talk. What I don't know is how to be a mother to a son because, well, that's just not my experience. 

For now, all I can do is focus on the things I'm excited to do with Forrest and hope that he enjoys them to... and that I learn, somewhere along the way, how to be the best mommy I can be. 

Here's a short list of all the things Forrest can be assured I will drag him to: 

1. Disneyland. Thanks to my friend, Meghan, I have a set of Mickey Mouse ears for him already. Several people have asked me what I'll do if Forrest doesn't like Disneyland. But really, does anyone not like Disneyland? It all depends on your experience. And I'm going to make sure he has the best time. Mainly because we'll go in the off season. 
2. Halloweentown. Did you know the classic Disney Channel Original Halloweentown was filmed in St. Helens, Oregon? And did you know that every year they recreate the set of the movie in St. Helens, Oregon? Did you know I grew up obsessed with Halloweentown and did not know this fact until just two days ago? Did you know that literally nothing will stop me from dragging Forrest there next year and maybe this year?  
3. Countless posed portrait shoots. Gotta capture the cute... while forcing him to wear a tiny suit. 
4. The Newport Aquarium. And I will make him take a picture with the shark jaw, of course. 
5. The High Desert Museum. One of my favorite places around Bend, I don't think I've ever heard anyone talk about it. It's not as exciting as an aquarium or drive through safari, but I loved visiting as a kid and teenager. They have foxes, owls, and more, plus a replica of a central Oregon pioneer town. It's a mix of natural history and Oregon history, all wrapped up in one. 
6. A million different pumpkin patches. You will love Fall, Forrest. You will love it!

An Ode to Amazon & the Weirdest Stuff I've Ordered

On Amazon Prime Day, a day that will live in infamy for its hilariously bad deals (it really was like the clearance section at TJ Maxx), I ordered a highchair and bra extenders. In terms of Amazon purchases, these aren't all together the weirdest things to order: I got the highchair of my choice for Forrest for $70 cheaper than usual (and $90 cheaper than Target) and I got bra extenders because, well, you know. 

It got me thinking about when I started ordering from Amazon and what I ordered... and what I've ordered over the years. 

I'm probably a bit of a strange bird in terms of my generation: I wasn't big into online shopping until probably 2010 or 2011. I never trusted online deals or any particular websites and in retrospect, this is probably why I was so good at not spending all my money immediately when I was younger (although I was very good at that early on). 

However, once I got into the swing of things on Amazon, I really went for it. Here's a run down. 

2008

In my first Amazon order ever, I purchased a workbook and laboratory manual to accompany my Deutsch: Na klar! An Introductory Germany Course textbook. Obviously, I was prepped to study German. Hilariously, the workbook I received also featured the teacher's answer section in the back, which I used because I'm not dumb and I'm a bit lazy when it comes to workbooks. 

2009

A few months later, I ordered over $200 worth of books, including Walt Whitman, Herman Melville, and Young Lonigan. I remember this term of my school career and I remember it well, because I was really tired of reading old white guy literature by the end of it. Thankfully, I also ordered a copy of Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl to break up the monotony. 

2010

Another year, another $200+ on books. This was the year I got really into sociology, obviously. A sample of the books I read include A New Look at Black Families, How Does it Feel to be a Problem, and the Rich Get Rich and the Poor Get Prison. As a side note, I'm currently rereading How Does it Feel to be a Problem and it's so good; it's only $10. Buy it. 

2011

This was the year I started to really get into Amazon. I ordered my last bundle of school books (sample: Shannon: A Poem of the Lewis and Clark Expedition), but I placed five other orders of non-school books and other weirdo stuff, including my camera. A link no longer exists for it, but I also ordered a bunch of bulk camera lens wipes. 

2012

I am not a night shopper and I don't usually make impulse decisions. But in my two paltry Amazon orders of 2012, I made two intensely impulsive decisions. On one of Danny's visits home, I bought Katamari Damacy for his Playstation 3. This game is essentially a game version of taking acid and flying to Tokyo, then trying to navigate your way around mid-trip. I also ordered the stupid expensive Lord of the Rings extended edition blu-rays because, duh, Danny and I needed them.

2013

2013 was the year I got Amazon Prime and it made a huge impact on my life. I ordered a planner that I literally have no recollection of using, a really horrible novel that I read on my honeymoon, books about emotional eating, and a copy of this awful movie for Danny. 

2014

In 2014, I hit my Amazon stride. Up until 2014, I'd been placing between 2 and 6 orders on Amazon. This year, I upped the ante and placed a total of 15 orders. It's almost embarrassing. This was also the year I started clawing my way out of the deep, dark depression that had encompassed my life in 2013 and early 2014, and in some ways, my purchases mirror that. 

I ordered the Venture Bros, a bunch of Kong toys for Remus, 21 Jump Street, TWO of these jump drives (Danny knows why), and a ton of Quest bars. Between these seemingly normal-if-disparate things, I ordered a ton of phone cases, a case for my Kindle, what feels like waaaay too many Kindle books, and a lot of chevron print stuff. 

2015

Don't judge me: in the first 7 months of 2015, I've placed more orders than I did for 2014. I don't leave my house anymore, guys! I'm a bloated, miserable, whiny, pregnant mess. What can I say? 

I've ordered Tummy Drops that made me sicker, Mama Butter which smells good but does nothing, tiny baby glasses,  this weird movie that is apparently part of a series, an embarrassing amount of scrapbooking supplies*, and stuff for my baby shower. I also ordered vitamin B6, prenatal vitamins (which I ended up trading for gummies from Target), at least 20 Kindle books, and another heap of iPhone covers. What can I say, I'm a collector for those iPhone covers. 

*If you're looking for cheap scrapbooking stuff, seriously check Amazon before going to a physical store. 

---

In many ways, tracing my Amazon purchases is like tracing my life. Everything in my world revolved around school for a long time. Post-school, it was cameras, GRE study books, and the occasional movie. In the year(s), I was depressed it was movies, weird video games, books to help with my depression (that didn't help), and gifts. In the past few years, I've ordered gifts, things that revolve around my hobbies (scrapbooking, reading, planners), things that revolve around my unending obsession with my body and its size (weight loss books, more books by Geneen Roth, a Fitbit, Quest bars), and alas, baby stuff. Enough baby stuff to build a tiny mountain. 

I can trace the crests and valleys of my life, the highs and lows, the classes I loved and hated, the months where I most wanted to curl into a ball and disappear. It's strange what an online purchase history can reveal--and what it can make me feel. 

My Eyebrows & Me: On Growing Up, Growing Out, & Giving Up

Has over-plucking your eyebrows ever really been in? 

When I was a young tween and started reading magazines like Seventeen and TeenVogue, the in eyebrow seemed to be the heavily plucked, but still plus, brow with a heavy, intense arm. Not bushy by any means, but not over-plucked. Every few years, a new celebrity with intense brows would emerge and teen magazines would encourage some kind of "au-natural" brow look, but it never seemed to really catch on. Even now, in the days of Cara Delevingne, the plucked, arched, filled, and gelled into place brow is in. 

The first time I plucked my eyebrows, I cried. I've always had thick, very dark eyebrows, two little caterpillars plopped right above my eyes. I hated them when I was younger. Mostly, I just wanted to avoid any kind of unibrow situation, which is what lead to me, at the age of 13, stealing an old pair of my mom's tweezers (sorry, mom) and sitting on my bathroom counter, alternatively crying at the fact that I didn't know what to do and the shockingly horrible pain of plucking teeny, tiny hairs out of my face. 

The very first thing I did, was pluck each eyebrow a little too far past the bridge of my nose. We all make this mistake and it is one I have continued to struggle with in the past 13 years of brow plucking. Throughout the rest of middle school and high school, I would painstakingly pluck between my brows and under them, essentially just cleaning up what was already a decent brow shape. 

As time passed, magazines suggested to me that I was supposed to be undertaking some kind of... shaping effort. I should be thinning my brows, or getting a good arch, or something. I didn't get it. Other magazine tutorials suggested that I needed some kind of teeny brush and scissors set to trim the brow hairs. I have always been nervous about messing too much with the things on my face that I can't change. Just as I can't change my face shape or my chubby cheekbones or my blotchy skin, I can't do a lot about my eyebrows, at least from my perspective. Jet black, thick, and lush: those are my eyebrows. 

I ignored the advice to dye them a light shade (terrifying), trim them (equally terrifying), and/or wax them off and just pencil them on (thank goodness). I undertook a serious effort to begin shaping my brows, plucking a good bit from underneath them to thin them out just a little bit (or that's what I told myself). 

This is when I boarded the eyebrow struggle bus and never really got off of it. Since then, I have struggled to make my eyebrows even or even look remotely the same. I stare at them in the mirror. Is it my imagination? Am I crazy? Or do they just not match? I shortened them. I over-plucked one and covered it with my bangs until I could salvage it. I would vow to not pluck for two months, only to find myself, a week later, tweezers in hand, getting rid of all the teeny, tiny baby hairs that I hated. 

This continued on for a while until senior year, when my poor eyebrows were so plucked beyond belief (not over-plucked, not really, just tortured) that I didn't really get stray baby hairs anymore. I left them alone mostly, plucking when I had to, but otherwise ignoring them and pretending that my eyebrows looked fine, just fine, not severe or anything. 

Post-college, my eyebrows had returned to a somewhat decent shape, forgiving the mistakes of my high-spirited youth. I started plucking again, carefully and deliberately, not making any attempts to change what was already there. 

Then, overnight it seemed, eyebrows were in. Your eyebrows had to be "on fleek" (what does it mean?); you need an eyebrow pencil, eyebrow powder, a special concealer brush. You need to pluck and trim and have a perfect arch and stare into cameras looking like a strangely realistic version of Maleficent. My eyebrows couldn't just be simple and clean anymore. I needed to do things with them on a daily basis. 

I couldn't deny the truth: my eyebrows had suffered some mistreatment over the years. I'd plucked in places that were unnecessary and ignored places that desperately needed assistance. I'd never trimmed my eyebrows in my life, something that most people agree is a good idea, if only for keeping your eyebrows in place all day. 

I decided to put down the tweezers and back away, seriously, for a few months. Partly, this was spurred on by being pregnant; my skin is sensitive enough in the best of times, but during pregnancy, every plucked hair was essentially like stabbing myself in the face. It hurt worse than it ever had before and left my skin puffy, red, and itchy. Plucking would have to wait. 

In the past few months, my eyebrows have successfully grown back to the way they looked pre-plucking. They are decidedly ok and just how I remember them: jet black, thick, and pretty lush. I'm lucky to have good hair and good eyebrows, so there is not much to complain about. They have almost no natural arch and essentially look like cartoon eyebrows you would draw on a stick figure. They are decidedly OK, even if they drive me a little nuts. 

Everyday, I fill in any less-lush spots with an eyebrow pencil from NYX and I brush them into place with a teeny, tiny brush. That seems to do as far as eyebrow maintenance is concerned. It's really not as if I was spending hours on plucking my eyebrows every week, but it's surprising how changing one part in your routine seems to free up time for other things (like coating myself in layers of Burt's Bee Mama Butter). 

I recently entertained the notion of going to an Eyebrow Professional and having my eyebrows done. Having someone else fret over putting an arch in these bad boys and worry about if they are too far apart or don't match. I quickly decided that was a no-go: it would require upkeep. I'd either have to go back or start the process of trying to do it myself all over again (a prospect that, given my current situation, seems a bit daunting).

Even if I haven't embraced my short legs, chubby thighs, or round face, I've managed to embrace my eyebrows. And that's at least one step in the right direction. 

5 Reasons to Start Keeping a Journal Today

I started keeping journals not long after I started reading the Amelia series of books by Marissa Moss. (If you love 1990s style websites, do yourself a favor and definitely click that link!) I can basically judge a person's character depending on if they read the Amelia book popularized by American Girl Magazine in the late 90s and early 00s. If you haven't read them, I take pity on you, but you need to get on Amazon and start ordering. Trust me on that one. 

I have storage containers full of journals. Journals upon journals upon journals. At least 100 of them. At least. I was not very good at keeping things in order and I flitted between notebooks and diaries based on which one was prettiest or newest. Some are half empty. As I got older, they became more ornate; in  high school, I all about filling my notebooks with intricate pencil drawings, printed photos from the internet, and collages. In college, I was a straight writer: no frills, no fuss. By my senior year, I was drawing intricate dates, writing long entries, including random lists (ala Colonel Gentleman from the Venture Bros, embarrassingly enough), pictures, ticket stubs, and more. Part-scrapbook, part journal, I hit the journal sweet spot. 

I've continued my journal habit for about 16 years, if I guess that I started legitimately writing journals at 10 or 11. That's pretty impressive. I'm not an "everyday" kind of journal writer. I often forget or write about things that happened weeks ago. In general, my journal entries have always been more about my feelings than about what I strictly did that day or recounting conversations. I collect things: lists of books, sticky notes, general lists, disorder, whatever. I like my journals to feel as messy and disorganized as my life. 

As much as I love journaling, I've always resented those "journal your way to happiness!!" blog posts. Journaling can definitely help get rid of negative or harmful emotions, but it's not a cure all. That's for sure. If journaling really allowed you to realize your greatest dreams with simply writing about it, I would be a world famous author who was 6'1" and looked like Kendall Jenner by now. 

There are lots of valid reasons to keep a journal. Here are five: 

1. People who write down things they are thankful for are happier. 

Ok, this is a proven fact: if you write down a few things that were good about your day, or that you are thankful for from your day, you'll become a happier person. Basically, researchers did a study where they split a group in half; one half wrote down five positive things from their day and the other half wrote down five negative things from their day. It was a journal experiment and the results were that the group who wrote down positive things were happier people at the end of the study. Not too shabby, huh? If you're looking to find little ways to improve your life, writing down a list of things you are thankful for or positive events from your day (even on a rotten, horrible, no-good day) can be a good first step. 

2. It's fun to look back on your past self and laugh (or cry). 

Some of my best, funniest writing happened when I was 16. Why? Because my journals from my sophomore and junior years of high school are hilariously melodramatic. They're so boring, but looking back makes me appreciate how I somehow managed to be intelligent and really stupid at the same time. I'm sure this will continue to be a theme as I get older. Someday, when I'm 50, I'll look back my blog posts and journals and think, "What is wrong with you?" 

3. It's relaxing. 

I don't buy into the "journaling will make you so happy" mumbo-jumbo, but man... decorating a journal page and writing even just a paragraph can be a hugely relaxing activity after a long day of work. Sometimes, I find myself feeling on edge and cranky, and I slowly realize that what I really, really need is 45 minutes to myself to doodle, decorate, and journal. 

4. It can improve your memory. 

Everyday, I write a few of the same lists: things I need to do; things I've done; and things I've learned. As I write those daily lists, I find that I am better able to remember everything I have to do and everything I've already done. And I retain information better. Research has shown that list-makers (those list obsessed amongst us) have better memories, probably because physically writing information down (not typing it!) aids in memory retention. 

5. You create a record for your family and children. 

Ok, it doesn't matter if you have kids right now or not. But by keeping journals, you keep somewhat of a record of your life for your children, grandchildren, and distant relatives. How cool is that? Have you ever gotten a chance to read a great-great-grandfather's journals or ledgers before? Isn't it fun? I hope to leave something more than a Facebook page behind for future generations, which is part of why I keep journals. 

What Do You Eat for Dinner?

I recently read an article about at-home meal kits, like Blue Apron and Plate. The idea behind these kits is to provide families and individuals with the ingredients necessary to try new meals. Why? Because the average American family eats out about 18 times a month and otherwise, they cycle through about 10 meals that they cook consistently over and over again. 

That fact--that the average family cycles through about 10 meals that they always cook--made me think about what my meal staples are. When the going gets rough and I don't feel like cooking, what do I make? 

1. Spaghetti. I would say that some form of spaghetti or pasta is on everyone's list of "go-to meals." It might be spaghetti with red sauce (like me) or alfredo or lasagna or something like that, but pasta is on nearly everyone's list in one form of another. 
2. Salmon with rice & sweet potatoes. This is a pretty standard protein+carb+veggie dish that I make all the time... and I'm sure others do. 
3. Barbecue chicken sandwiches with coleslaw. This is one of Danny and I's absolute favorite summer meals that we can make a variation of throughout the year thanks to my crockpot. However, after getting pregnant, I couldn't handle shredded chicken so we hadn't enjoyed it for a while. 
4. Tacos or burritos. Another very standard staple. I use fat free refried beans and ground beef to make a filling that's great for tacos, burritos, salads, etc. 
5. Pizza/calzone. I make a pretty awesome pizza dough (it's very easy), so I make pizza or calzone at least once a week or so. It's a great way to get the pizza fix without buying a pizza. This way, I can make it a little healthier. 
6. Hamburgers with box mac & cheese. This is probably the unhealthiest thing in my rotation, but I just love that orange box mac & cheese. 
7. Grilled cheese & soup. Soups are usually stew; chili; veggie; or potato. Usually homemade, but occasionally I buy potato soup. 
8. Breakfast for dinner. Pancakes or waffles, eggs, and bacon is my usual go-to for a quick and easy dinner. But if I feel like getting crazy, I will sometimes make biscuits and sausage gravy or some kind of fancy omelette. 

That's it. I can't even think of 10! I have 8 meals I usually make for Danny and I. I can think of some I make a few times a year, like rouladen and colcannon or flautas, but aren't "staples" quite the way these ones are. 

Writing these down made me realize how much I need to add variety to our dinners. (Full disclosure: from February to May, I think I cooked a real dinner twice. And that was because other people were coming over.) I have so many cookbooks that I never use. Maybe it's time to put them to use...

What are your go-to meals? Can you think of 10?