Book Review: Camino Beach, by Amanda Callendrier

It's been a minute since I've posted a book review, but I think I'll be posting more in the future. You can always follow my colorful reviews on Goodreads here. Let's get started! 

This book is Camino Beach, by Amanda Callendrier. It's a debut novel and here's a teaser description: 

“In this poignant debut loaded with humor, heartbreak, and Southern charm, old friends road-trip their way to solving a mystery and righting a long-ago wrong.”

I was attracted purely because of this description, because I love Southern novels; I love road trip stories; and I love mysteries. 

Friends, this book was absolutely none of those things. Note: this review does contain spoilers to the entire nonexistent plot of this book. 

The setting was absolutely nonexistent. If you removed the specific town name, you could plop this novel down in any setting and it would be exactly the same, minus Myrtle Beach. And spoiler alert, they spend approximately 12 hours in Myrtle Beach in one of the most useless and rambling plot lines ever. 

Most importantly, do you want to read a book full of absolutely repulsive characters who have absolutely no conscience or self-awareness? This is the book for you then. 

TRIGGER WARNING: This book contains the sexual abuse of a teenager by a teacher. It is treated like said teenager "cheating" on his girlfriend. It never acknowledges that he was sexually abused by a teacher in a position of power. This is abhorrent. It happens near the end of the book; if it had been "revealed" earlier, I would have put it on my "do not finish" list. I just want to warn you. I didn't like the book before this was revealed, but it made me absolutely sick that I'd obligated myself to review it. 

In 1997, Sarah and Kristen were just two absolutely awful teenage girls in some vague Southern Town. They graduated high school, went on to college, graduated, and went onto equally disappointing lives: Sarah is divorced, lives in an apartment above the bookstore she owns, and routinely treats her next door neighbor/former classmate/best friend, Jack, like absolutely crap; on the opposite end of the spectrum, Kristen is a tiny, blonde former gymnast who married a big ol' slob named Chris (yes, they are both named Kris/Chris) and has three anonymous children that she never talks about except to complain about them. She works some kind of job, but otherwise, buys Jimmy Choos, lives in a McMansion, and drives a Rover. 

In high school, there was a third friend, Roxanne, the only likable one in the bunch. Roxanne was impulsive, self-destructive, and, most of all, fun. However, she disappeared before they graduated and while they did call local boarding schools after her mom (their gym teacher, inexplicably) told them she was sent to boarding school, they didn't do much to find her. 

Except when their 20 year high school reunion rolls around. 

Kristen decides it's time to bite the bullet and find Roxanne. Sarah, our primary narrator, is nervous because she did something "awful" that she is sure is the cause of Roxanne's disappearance. They go on a saga to buy an El Camino because Roxanne owned one. This takes up approximately 1/3 of the book. They buy an El Camino named Elvira. 

Jack decides to join them for the trip to Myrtle Beach, after Kristen's private investigator turns up an address for Roxanne there. We are treated to multiple unpleasant scenes were Sarah is an absolute nightmare of a human to her ex-husband. 

Ok, slight diversion from going over the plot: Sarah got divorced because... reasons? It's never fully explained, which is fine, but she treats her ex like absolute garbage. Why? Because Sarah is a garbage person. There, I said it. Take this character and throw her away; she is a self-centered, obnoxious, mean, vile human being. There is nothing redeemable about Sarah as a character. I do not understand why she has friends or why she received this characterization. She sucks. She divorced her husband because he was slightly resistant to her taking out a loan to buy a bookstore. Listen, do you know how much of a struggle it is to own an independent bookstore? It is NOT easy. I love bookstores and I'd be hesitant too! But this book apparently takes place in an alternate reality where people go to bookstores all the time. Her ex-husband is a professor, a fact that they make fun of every time he is mentioned. That's right, he's the only person in the book who uses his brain and they treat him like dirt. Cool. 

They head for Myrtle Beach. Along the way, they stop in Sarah's college down and Kristen, another garbage person, destroys a college students senior project. Seriously. 

They get to Myrtle Beach and find a hotel that is $60 a night, but also has a bar beside the pool. There are so many awful, useless parts to this book, but the road trip to Myrtle Beach (the only road trip) only takes up about 5 chapters, tops, and is super pointless. 

The next morning, they surprise drop into Roxanne's address. Surprise, it's not Roxanne. It's her mom, Mrs. Wilder, their mean gym teacher. She has no idea where Roxanne is. Cool! They leave, meet Jack's college roommate Bert for margaritas, get drunk in a Mexican restaurant, and then they all get into a massive fight. 

Then, they go home. There is no plot.

This is the part of the novel where I stopped caring. It was so anticlimactic. They literally just go home. Kristen gets a bug in her butt to go check school records; they do and guess what? The school has all their school records. Listen, a records room with your "official record" is a thing that literally doesn't exist. But whatever, in alternate reality where garbage people are allowed to flourish, it's real. It's so exhausting to have this scene. As if there is some giant room in every public school where they keep every piece of banal information about every kid that ever stepped in the building. 

Anyway, they end up finding a sticky note on the back of Roxanne's file with the number of a school that's in, you guessed it, Sarah's college town. They do no research and go. They find Roxanne. She's perfectly normal, living in a nice little house with her daughter, also named Sarah. She is pleasant and happy, but she's not the Roxanne they know. 

Ok, let's back up a minute: throughout all these scenes, we get treated to scenes from high school Sarah. HS Sarah is somehow 400x worse than present day Sarah; she is boring, mean, and absolutely obsessed with herself. So, the entire novel I thought the bad thing she did to Roxanne would be huge: she ratted out Roxanne about drugs or she actually murdered her or SOMETHING. No. Here's what she did: she signed a statement saying that Roxanne had been cheating off her homework to avoid getting her scholarship taken away. 

I'm sorry, but that's not awful. That's barely even bad. That's literally what every teenager would do if they were caught to be helping their friend cheat. Roxanne had been cheating off Sarah; Sarah admitted it; and...?

Anyway, in their meeting with Roxanne, it turns out that's NOT why Roxanne left school. She left because her mom had been messing around with Roxanne's boyfriend. So the principal helped her transfer schools and leave. Cool for Roxanne. She met her current husband, got pregnant, got married. She chilled. Never once does anyone say, "Holy crap, your mom sexually abused a student?" No, they act like her boyfriend Mark cheated on her. These. People. Are. Garbage. 

So, after all that time, the bad thing Sarah did didn't even matter. It's not even part of the story. The only person who cares about it is Sarah because she's obsessed with herself. 

Kristen and Sarah then leave.

Because Sarah is obsessed with her stupid self, she goes to visit the former principal to ask WHY he made her sign that statement. I'm not sure why. It's pretty obvious. They were busting Roxanne, rightfully, for cheating. The principal basically says he just did it to make a point and that it's ok that she signed it because all teenagers do selfish stuff. No kidding, the principal, even though we're supposed to see him as some kind of delusional mean guy, is the only intelligent character in this book; he looks Sarah dead in the face and is like, "people usually grow out of being so selfish, but whatever, you seem like a piece of work." 

Sarah feels enlightened and goes to Kristen's house. Kristen had spent tons of time complaining about her husband; however, when Sarah brings up this past conversation in relation to her talk with the principal, Kristen acts like Sarah is accusing her of something. Listen, Kristen, I know you're a few slices short of a whole pie, but follow along. Kristen ends up getting a new shower head and is suddenly in a better mood, proving that she's an absolutely repulsive, stupid character and Sarah isn't much better. 

So Sarah leaves, feeling pretty low. She calls Bert to ask him to go to the reunion with her and he says no, because Jack made it clear he likes Sarah. Jack is a pushover and while he is pretty obnoxious, he deserves better than Sarah, a woman who literally never thinks of anyone but herself. 

So Sarah goes to the reunion with Jack and proceeds to get drunk within, like, 5 minutes. Then Mark, Roxanne's high school boyfriend who was sexually abused by a teacher, comes up and asks about Roxanne. Sarah, who is awful, acts belligerent and causes a scene; then Jack punches a man who was sexually abused as a teenager by a teacher and they act like he's a hero. Wow, I'm so glad I read this book. 

Kristen and Roxanne then bust into the reunion, dressed to the nines. They all go outside and make the real Camino Beach and get even more drunk in the back of it. It turns out, Roxanne did name her daughter after Sarah (WHY) and apparently had watched Sarah a few times while she was at college because she literally lived in the same town. This is proof that Sarah is totally self-absorbed; Roxanne had been in this sandwich place once while Sarah was there and SARAH DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE. 

Eventually, Jack confesses that, actually, he really likes Sarah. They kiss. It's totally inexplicable why Jack likes her because, again, Sarah is an absolute garbage can of a human being. 

If you want to read a book about the most self-absorbed awful people in the entire universe, go ahead. Read it. I have no idea why it was written. A bunch of boring, mean white women going on an adventure to find the friend they treated like crap 20 years ago. Nothing redeemable. Nothing to learn. Awful people not getting their comeuppance.

My Summer Goals

You may have noticed I've been a little quiet lately. On here, on Instagram, not so much on Twitter. I should probably address that now. 

A few weeks ago, I started to get pretty extreme anxiety about... the internet. I got really scared about how much of my life I've shared (over roughly 10 years of my life), of how much I've shared not just about myself, but about my son. You might notice that posts specifically about my son have disappeared. There isn't a lot I can do about Instagram--I've shared a lot of photos of him, but I've gone through and removed any photos that I felt violated his privacy. I only include him in my Instagram Story now and rarely post photos of him on my feed. 

There is a huge part of me that feels maybe I've moved on from blogging. Maybe this isn't for me anymore. I've been blogging for almost 10 years solid--week after week, month after month. I've written an absolute ton of words. I recently went back and deleted my old blogs--yes, Locked Out and Ellipsis are gone for good. That happened after I received a scary, weird email relating to a very old outfit photo someone found on Pinterest. 

My anxiety has been really, really high lately. Taking a step away from blogging allowed me to feel better about everything I've shared. Ultimately, I don't think any of it is too damaging. But putting myself out there opens me up to a lot of scary things. Now that I'm responsible for a small human being, I worry a lot more, specifically in relation to my safety and his safety. 

I've been feeling a lot better and I'll be stepping back into blogging again. It's hard to shift from posting entirely about my life to barely mentioning it. I'll always be more real and personable on Instagram, but I'm trying to be more conscious and careful there as well. 

Anyway, that's a very long way to say: I got scared; I took an almost month long break; but I feel better now. 

On that note, let's talk about goals for the summer. 

1. Focus on content again. 

For a few months, I was really great at blogging day-to-day. This weekend, I'm going to be sitting down and writing out an editorial calendar for June, July, and August to keep me on track again. 

2. Keep up my gym routine. 

If you follow me on Instagram (and watch my stories), you know that I got to the gym 4-5 days a week again. I've been posting my workouts and progress. My main goal, honestly, is to increase my arm strength. I can leg press over 115 pounds, but I can barely do 15 bicep curls at 10 pounds. That's embarrassing. 

3. Clean up my social media accounts. 

This is an overwhelming task. I have nearly 10 years worth of tweets (cringe). A few weeks ago, I deleted about 3,000 tweets from college. That was 18 months worth of going through and filtering. It's tough, long work, especially because it involves looking back at every dumb thought I shared. But it's important spring cleaning. 

Beauty Review: Matrix Biolage R.A.W. Uplift Shampoo & Conditioner*

Disclaimer: I received these products for free via Influenster & Matrix Biolage in exchange for an honest review. To learn more about my disclosure policy, please click here. 

It's been a while, hasn't it? A few weeks ago, I decided to take a step back from blogging and decide what I really wanted to do. I'm still debating on what, exactly, my goals are anymore, but I think I'm back on the blogging train. More about this later. 

For now, let's get on to a simple little product review. 

I was extremely excited to try out some new hair products, especially these ones from Matrix Biolage. You can learn more about this new line of shampoos here.  

After taking an Influenster qualifying quiz, I was sent the Matrix Biolage R.A.W. Uplift Shampoo & Conditioner set. Here's what both the shampoo and conditioner promise: "Biolage R.A.W. Uplift Shampoo, with black sesame and grapefruit, purifies flat, fine hair without stripping for lightweight body." These products are 71% natural-origin and 99% biodegradable; as well, they contain no silicones, no parabens, and no artificial colorants. 

All good things, yes? 

Here's a little hair background on me: I have very thick, but very fine hair. (This is not an oxymoron: "thin" describes my hair's texture; "thick" describes the amount of hair I have.) My hair, overall, is very healthy, but very straight and very flat by nature. I also do not use heat on my hair unless absolutely necessary. I haven't used a blow drier in over two years and a straight iron in over three years. I've been using eSalon's shampoo and conditioner for color treated hair and while I like it, it doesn't do anything spectacular (although it does help eSalon's so-so hair dye last longer). 

So what did I think of the Biolage shampoo and conditioner? 

Firstly, both products have a pretty... odd smell to them. I'm 100% behind not using artificial dyes, but they smelled like, for lack of a better word, wet dirt. Not exactly what I want my hair to smell like. I soldier on, however, and used them. 

Secondly, the shampoo made my hair feel very clean and it rinsed extremely well. The conditioner made my hair feel very smooth and easy to comb after using. 

Thirdly, after letting my hair air dry, I didn't notice any additional volume or body. In fact, my hair is somewhat flatter after using both products. 

So, what's the summary? In all, I wasn't particularly impressed. The shampoo and conditioner did make my hair quite shiny, but after using both together, I feel like they don't actually do anything to provide any additional body or volume, especially if you don't use heat styling tools. My hair often has more volume if I don't use conditioner; that's an experiment I'll need to run soon and I'll adjust my review accordingly once I get the chance. 

However, for the sake of honesty: I did not notice any benefits, in terms of volume or body, in the shampoo & conditioner combination. Which is, of course, disappointing. That being said, my hair did appear quite shiny and healthy after using. 

Overall, not a terrible product, but, as with most volumizing shampoos, without heat treatments, they fall flat.  

4 Summer Toddler Essentials

Summer weather has just barely started here in Oregon. If you follow me on Instagram, you've seen a few stories about playing outside with Forrest in the afternoon. One day, the weather even topped 75 degrees, a true feat! 

However, as the summer rapidly approaches, I start thinking about all the things that toddler's need during the day--especially during the summer. If your toddler is like my toddler, they are, essentially, needy creatures. 24/7 need. And again, if your toddler is like my toddler, they want to be outside, and playing, and not eating or sleeping or drinking, 100% of the time. 

For that reason, I made a list of our summer essentials. The 4 things that, if nothing else, I will make sure we have to keep Forrest entertained and healthy. Here they are. 

1. Lots of sunscreen. 

If you've ever read my blog (and fingercrossed you have), you know that I wear sunscreen all year round. I'm incredibly pale and very prone to sun damage. Needless to say, my son did not inherit my husband's olive-toned, hearty skin. Ugh. He gets absolutely slathered before we go outside, even on overcast days. We are barely making it through molars; I am not adding sunburn to that mix! 

I'm a big fan of Babyganics sunscreen (as well as their other products) for my son. He has pretty sensitive skin (again, like mine, sorry kid!) and gets rashes very easily. I have found that Babyganics is the only thing that doesn't end up giving him a bumpy rash. Also, the sunscreen sticks are super convenient.

2. Hats.

Being totally honest, I really despite the hats that are available for toddlers. They're all bucket hats. Yes, all of them. It's awful. I guess they're cute, if you stretch your imagination and accept that anything slightly smaller than normal is cute. But they're still bucket hats. 

As ugly as I find them though, I put one on Forrest's little head every time we go outside. Why? It covers his face, protecting his eyes and face from the sun. Again: sun damage. If your toddler has more hair than mine (which, 98% of toddlers do, unfortunately), you might be able to skip a hat if you get a good layer of sunscreen on the face. But for the bald toddlers out there, solidarity; my kid has to wear one of these things. (This one from Carter's isn't too tragic, and even with Forrest's 66% size head, he can fit into the 9m size!)  

3. A toddler leash

You read that right! You see that picture correctly! I am recommending, yes, a leash for your child. Here's why: toddlers are super independent. Their growing independence is linked to their bad behavior (terrible 2s, anyone?), their sleep regressions (ugh), and their occasional refusal to eat. Those trips to the zoo, to Target, to Disneyland, to the grandparents, they don't want to be held. They don't want to be worn. They don't want to sit in their hot, uncomfortable stroller. They wanna walk, baby!

So let them. Buy the leash. I like these backpack versions. (We actually own a dog-shaped version ourselves.) They can love it by helping you put their things into it: a favorite toy or book, a sippy cup, a sunscreen stick, and then zipping it up. Then attach the leash and let them get their independence on while also being able to keep them close. It's a win-win. 

4. Some kind of outdoor toy

I am not personally a fan of the water table (in Oregon, these just mold within a few weeks), but some people (and climates) totally love them. If you're really coveting the one in the photo, you can check it out here. Otherwise, I have a few other suggestions: 

• Bubbles
• Sand toys (even if you don't have a sand box or table) 
• Sidewalk chalk
• Toy brooms
• Soccer ball or tennis balls

Basically, I'm a fan of keeping outdoor toys simple. Forrest has the most fun outside with his little bucket of sand toys, some bubbles, and nature, honestly. 

Refresh Your Workout Wardrobe This Spring

My husband and I recently rejoined the gym. If you read my blog(s) (um, this one or the one before, or the one before that), you probably know that, until I got pregnant, I worked out nearly every day. At least 5 times a week for sure. I love working out, but once I had Forrest, it became really challenging. 

Going back to a gym routine lately has been so much fun. On the downside, however, all my work out clothes are from pre-pregnancy. Can you see where I'm going with this? 

It's a sad situation right now. Especially the sports bra situation. So let's look at some options for refreshing our spring workout wardrobes. 

1. Sports Bras

Nike Pro-classic in Black/White / Good Vibes High Neck Sports Bra from GOOP / Women's Studio Bra in Sapphire Poppy. 

Sports bras are always a challenge. Hopefully I'm not alone in this. Everyone has a particular style they favor and a particular fit they like. I picked three different types: a very traditional sports bra (the Nike); a cute-almost-crop-top sports bra; and a high-backed sports bra with lower sides. All three are super cute and not super expensive. 

2. Tops

Inhale/Exhale Top / Rodeo Rags Tank Top / World's Okayest Runner. 

Athletic tops are one of those things that I believe are inherently a little scammy, right? You can wear just about any shirt to workout in, as long as you're comfortable. I prefer loose fitting tank tops, so I picked three cute ones for your enjoyment (I'm loving the World's Okayest Runner tank). In general, I buy my workout tops at Forever 21 or Target: wherever I can get some affordable that I'm totally ok getting covered in sweat. 

3. Leggings

Aerie Chill Jogger / Nike Workout Pants / gFast Performance Colorblock Leggings

Honestly, I could spent the rest of my life in athletic leggings and be absolutely fine. Also, if I ever become magically super wealthy, I will just buy hundreds of pairs of the best leggings I can find. I love them. My favorite workout leggings are from Aerie and they unfortunately don't make them anymore (grumble), but these "chill joggers" look super comfy for workouts and for lounge. If you're more a traditionalist, the black Nike workout pants are classic and the GAP leggings are perfect for late Spring/early Summer runs outside. 

3 Summer Beauty Essentials

It's gonna be MAY! 

Can you believe it's May? Wasn't it just September... and Forrest's birthday... and Halloween... like a few weeks ago? Man, time flies. 

Summer is approaching at an astonishing rate and that means it is time to talk about beauty essentials. Everyone has their own ideas of what they like during the summer, but when it comes to the basics, I stand by my 3 choices: sunscreen, a summery nail polish, and a boss body cream. Here's why. 

1. Sunscreen

I sunburn in a matter of about 10 minutes. I still have sunburn lines on my legs from when I was pregnant. Yeah, that's a solid two years ago. Yikes. Hi skin damage! I don't leave the house without sunscreen: even on cloudy days, even when I'm not planning to be outside, and especially when I do plan to be hanging outside. Reminder: you should use an entire bottle of sunscreen if you are outside for more than 6 hours, reapplying every 45-60 minutes. I know, but most sunscreens do not last past 60 minutes, with 80 minutes being the highest threshold. Here are my top choices: 

• Clinique Virtu-oil Body Mist Broad Spectrum SPF 30: spray sunscreens are a true gift because they are easy to apply and reapply. This mist is also paraben free and goes on smoothly. It also provides a "cooling sensation," so if you're already a little bit burnt from earlier sun exposure, it will sooth those burns as well as protect. 
• Beautycounter Protect Stick Sunscreen: BeautyCounter is famous for their organic products that are free from "toxic ingredients." This sunscreen stick is kid friendly and super easy to apply. It's basically a deodorant stick. It smells extremely good, especially the limited edition scent "Sweet Tooth." 
• Sun Bum SPF 50: This is the highest SPF sunscreen I have here. I usually do not wear under 50 SPF (except on my face for daily wear) and Sun Bum is the brand I pretty much always turn to. Their sunscreen is hypoallergenic, cruelty free, and water resistant. For $14.99 for a bottle at Target, it's also the cheapest & most accessible. 
• Fresh Sugar Sport Treatment Sunscreen SPF 30: This is another stick sunscreen and here's why I love it: it smells seriously amazing and it's formulated to actually go on your eyelids. Most sunscreens are not safe around the eyes (not even BeautyCounter's), but this stick from Fresh is. I've gotten sunburns on my eye lids before and let me tell you: no bueno. The only downside is that this sunscreen is a little on the oily side, but if you're outside in the sun, sweating and having fun, you're going to be sweating--sorry, I mean, "glistening"--anyway. 

2. Nail Polish

Nothing like a new summer nail polish to be your "signature color." I stopped wearing nail polish for the last few months, except for a few occasional applications that totally wrecked my nails. However, I still have a few favorites on my list this year. 

• Essie in Madison Ave-Hue: I love a bright pink and this one is perfect for the summer. It's an electric jelly polish that goes perfect with the trendy, muted summer looks this year. 
• OPI Nail Lacquer in A Great Opera-Tunity: I love a nude polish and this one is honestly so pretty. I would describe it as a coral-nude with a slight metallic sheen (like a lot of OPI polishes). It's perfect for all those summer events (weddings, barbecues, pool parties, great Instagram photos...) 
• Nails Inc in Boho Notting Hill: this glitter topper literally makes me want to drop everything and go buy it immediately. I have a few Nails Inc glitters and they are so pretty. I love that this one looks like splatter paint: artsy, bright, and summery. 

3. Body Lotion

"Body lotion, Michelle?" you're probably thinking. Yes, girl, body lotion. Pools, oceans, sprinklers, sun screen, potential sun damage, drinking, barbecues... all that summer action can leave you with dry skin, especially if you get sunburned or spend a lot of time in a pool. There's nothing like a nice refreshing body lotion at the end of the day to keep you looking fly. These are my favorites. 

• It's Skin Mini Bebe Hand Cream: I've grown increasingly obsessed with Korean beauty products and this hand cream is one of them. Firstly, it's so cute. Look at it. Secondly, it is the perfect hand cream to keep in your purse or beside your bedside table. It's thick and moisturizing without being heavy or greasy. Also, it comes in amazing scenes; my favorites are Lime and Vanilla Cotton. 
• Lush Charity Pot Body Lotion: I resisted Lush for a long time because I am not totally sold on bath bombs (so much glitter everywhere). However, this body lotion is so good, it makes up for it. With the scent of rosewood oil and ylang ylang, it's pretty mild, but it gets the job done. Also, I love tubs of body lotion; it just feels a little bit more effective, right? 
• Kiehl's Crème de Corps Soy Milk & Honey Body Polish: Ok, I lied a little bit. This is a body polish; however, it does moisturize as it exfoliates. In the summer, you can build up a lot of product (sunscreen, chlorine, salt water, body lotion, bronzer, etc.) on your skin, which can lead to dullness, dryness, and red spots. This polish is perfect for getting a fresh start once a week. Then apply some of that Lush Charity Pot and call it a night. 

Why I Got Rid of All My Notebooks

I've been receiving notebooks as gifts for as long as I can remember. Well, as long as I was telling people I wanted to be a writer. Notebooks are easy gifts: they can be beautiful, they can be practical, and it's an easy writing accessory that everyone understands. 

As someone who has kept a journal my entire life, these notebook gifts have been a blessing, honestly. I've rarely had to buy my own journals, especially if someone goes above-and-beyond and gives me a Moleskine for Christmas. However, it also has meant that I've always had a surplus of notebooks. 

In fact, this surplus started to get really embarrassing when I was pregnant. I unearthed a box of blank notebooks while getting organized and cleaning out Forrest's room. I had a stack of empty notebooks on my desk, on the bookshelf in my office, in a drawer under my desk... I had notebooks. I had notebooks upon notebooks. I had more notebooks than I would ever use in my life. Why? Because I cannot hand write fiction, or poetry, or anything. The only thing I use notebooks for is journaling. And a girl can only journal so much. 

It was time to bite the bullet. I always wanted to be the kind of person who could quietly sit with a notebook and write a story. At least get out the bare bones of it. I like journaling by hand and I like taking notes; I like writing out my grocery lists and to do lists. But trying to describe something, to actually write, by hand is a huge challenge for me. I know myself well enough now to know that it's just never going to happen. That's fine! 

So I had to get rid of all those notebooks. 

Some of them were beautiful, and expensive. Some of them I had bought myself, sure that the "right notebook" would spur my creativity. Some were cheap ones I'd bought in the last days of School Supply sales. Some were gifts. Some were party favors, or I received free from work. 

They all went. Into a box, that went to Goodwill, that hopefully sold them to someone who needed them, who can actually write in a notebook. It felt weird to let go of them, to let go of the idea of the kind of person I thought I could try to be. 

5 Tips to Make Working from Home Easier

It's easy to think that working from home will be, well, easy. You're in the comfort of your own home. You can stay in your pajamas. You can eat a real breakfast, drink as much coffee as you want, lounge in bed as you look at spreadsheets. 

Reality sets in promptly the first time you try to work from home. At least for me. The moment I started working from home a lot (when I was pregnant with Forrest, primarily), it's like everything in my house became way more... distracting. I worked from home an average of 2 or 3 days a week when I was pregnant, thanks in part to exhaustion, preeclampsia, and morning sickness. There were days where it felt like I could not focus and, of course, days where I got everything I needed done completed so I could wallow in bed and try not to throw up again. 

I don't work from home anymore. Why? Well, working from home with a toddler is near impossible. (If you somehow achieve this, I need your secrets.) I do work from home if Forrest is at my mom's or daycare, like when I was sick in March. 

If you're thinking of starting to take some work from home days, these tips are for you. 

1. Have a "I'm working" spot. 

And I don't mean the desk where you normally charge your computer. I've always been a person who has a desk where I spend most of my evenings, but I know this is becoming less and less common. However, when I'm working from home, I clear another space in my house--usually the kitchen table--to be my "office." Having a clearly designated space, as if I was actually in my work office, helps me to stay focused. 

2. Use the same background noise that you use at work. 

If you listen to music, or podcasts, at work, do that at home too. When I first started working from home, I tried to use my "at home" background noise--the TV--and found it way too distracting. If I listen to music or a podcast, it's like my brain assumes I really am at work and I stay more focused. 

3. Use that familiar study tip: take 10 minute breaks every 30 minutes. 

Honestly, I do this at work (in the office) too. Every 30 minutes, stand up, stretch, walk around for 10 minutes. Then get back to work. Your brain will feel remarkably refreshed and you'll be better able to focus. 

4. If you can, turn off the Wifi. 

If you have the kind of job where you don't need a 24/7 connection to the internet, turn off your Wifi when you're really getting into a task. I often do this when I'm trying to write and getting distracted by Twitter notifications and everything the internet has to offer. 

5. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. 

Hey, if you try to work from home (to reduce commute costs or because you're sick), and it's just not working--hey, that's ok. It's not for everybody! Don't try to keep forcing it if you are aware that you aren't getting everything done or achieving the goals you want. It's possible that getting out of the house might help--working from a coffee shop or bookstore might work better for you. Or, maybe you're just an office kind of person.