My Top 5 Budget Buys

I haven't always been good about saving money. I used to spend money as soon as I had it: I paid my bills, yes, but I also bought new clothes, new shoes, new make up, almost every week. When I think back to it, it was really fun, but it was really irresponsible. I had a tiny savings account and no idea what I would do if something really big happened. I was more than breaking even, but I was still limping the closer I got to pay day. 

My big wake up call came when I had Forrest. My husband and I had been saving pretty effectively for a long time, but at the tail end of my pregnancy, we were using our savings to occasionally pay off credit card bills (I needed a new crib set and swing, ok?). Forrest was born premature and our hospital bill was huge. The amount that was sent to our insurance was $12,000 just for Forrest's stay. We ended up paying over $8,000 total for my preeclampsia stay, labor & delivery, and our stay after Forrest was born. That's a lot of money--which we didn't totally have. 

I was lucky to have help paying off that monumental bill, but many people aren't so lucky. That's why it's so important to save. With our next baby, I don't want to be blindsided by another huge hospital bill. That meant starting a strict savings plan and cutting our monthly expenses. 

As a result, there are some things I just buy cheap or in bulk. These are my five favorites. 

1. Buy Formula at Costco

Costco is one of the easiest places to stock up on supplies, but realistically, not everyone has the income that allows them to drop $200 at one place. As well, storing that much toilet paper and paper towels can be a challenge, even in the biggest homes. However, if you're a mom who is formula feeding an infant, Costco is the place to buy formula. Why? They take the manufacturer checks AND they have their own generic brand of formula. They sell the major brands as well. A $50 pack of formula from Costco saved us about $20 a month and I didn't have to rush out and buy formula without a coupon. Total win. 

2. Use Cartwheel at Target

If you have a smartphone and you shop at Target, do yourself a favor and download Cartwheel immediately. It took me forever to start using it, but it's genius! I scan everything in my cart as I'm walking to the register and add any deals. I usually save $3-5 per trip, which isn't a ton (although I also use my Redcard to save 5%!), but it does add up. Staples like cotton balls, q-tips, household cleaners, etc. are almost always on Carthweel, as well as discounted in the store. You can get some amazing deals! 

3. Use Amazon Prime

I'm not a fan of subscription deals. The only one I really use is my Honest diaper bundle, but I'll be honest (har har): that saves me time, rather than money. However, Amazon Prime is my go to place to find affordable, household items that I don't feel like trying to track down in stores. That means, picture frames, bulletin boards, bookshelves, bins to hold items in the pantry... all those little things that are hard to find in stores for affordable prices. 

4. Shop the Dollar Store

"Oh, I loooove those vases in your window!" A friend cooed to me several months ago. News flash: they all cost about $1 a piece. I saved up beer, wine, and other glass bottles, spray painted them with leftover spray paint I had around the house, and used fake flowers from the Dollar Store for the flowers. Easy. Cheap. Quick. 

Whenever I need something decor related, I go to the Dollar Store. I made cake platters for Forrest's birthday party out of candle holders and plates from the Dollar Store; my pantry is organized with bins and labels from the Dollar Store; and whenever I need cheap table clothes, napkins, etc., I go to the Dollar Store. There is literally no need to spend tons at party supply stores. I can make or find almost everything at the Dollar Store. Really. All the decor for Forrest's party cost me about $15, not including spray paint. 

5. Shop on Fridays (or whenever your favorite grocery store has deals)

Our local grocery store has $5 Fridays. What does that mean? Along with any coupons they have from the Sunday insert, they also have special deals on certain items. One Friday, I got boxes of Wheat Things for 3 for $5 (a bargain). Or packages of pineapple (which you can freeze) will be 3 for $5. There are multiple $5 deals every Friday throughout the store and it can save us a ton of money. Most grocery stores do things like this--it might be Thursdays or Saturdays as well. Find the best time to grocery shop and you can save big. (And remember--shopping early in the morning might be a pain, but it's when grocery stores are least busy!) 

5 Desktop Wallpapers to Make You Feel Like the Dream Girl You Are

Maybe it's lame, but I really do believe that when you think something, it becomes true. It's like in Wild when Cheryl writes about how fear is just a story we tell ourselves--so to conquer fear, we have to just tell a different story. 

I recently reread Wild and I've been using that to help confront the things that, well, are still holding me back. Anxiety is just a story I fell myself: this might happen, or maybe this will happen and you'll be embarrassed, or why start? What if you fail? 

To overcome those things, I have to confront them. 

A big part of this is motivating myself to be better: to follow my dreams, to do the things I love simply because I love them (not because I need to be perfect at them). It's a hard thing to do. I truly believe that seeing the same message every day--whether it's "You got this" or "things will get better"--makes a difference. Heck, it can even just be something I enjoy looking at that will remind me, hey, tell yourself the other story... not the scary one. 

Here are a few wallpapers for your desktop or laptop to remind you that, no matter what, you're a dream girl. 

Download here. 

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Download here. 

My Blog Story

I started blogging, approximately, in Spring 2009. But my blog didn't really get kickstarted until the fall of 2009, when I started interning for CollegeFashion.net. That's when I really gained some of my favorite readers, which blogs of their own that I love. 

When I sat down to write this blog post, I thought I would just whiz through my history of blogging: I'm someone who has changed my blog a lot throughout my time blogging. I started on Wordpress. Then I switched to Blogger, where I stayed until 2 years ago when I jumped to Squarespace. But ultimately, that's a big boring. If you want the full story, I can certainly tell it--but really, that's about it. I didn't know what I wanted to do and I changed my mind frequently. Who doesn't? 

Now that I feel like I'm finally in a good place with my blogging life, I feel like I'm able to look back and see what decisions I made that were right and which were wrong. I want to share a few things I've learned along the way. 

I wish I'd never taken an outfit photo.

I loved fashion blogging for a long time, but the truth is, I wish I'd never walked down that road. Ultimately, I think putting my appearance out there for judgement made me too aware of being judged and how I was perceived--and I've been fighting those effects ever since. I don't want to say that fashion blogging made me have body image issues--but it certainly didn't help the issues I already had. 

I know this statement will be heartbreaking to my friends I made when I was posting outfits every day. And I guess I should say--I'm glad I took outfit photos when I did. I really enjoyed doing them. But in the end, they made me obsess about myself in a way that wasn't healthy. 

I wish I'd switched to a better platform sooner. 

I visited my old blog, Ellipsis, the other day and, let me just say--it looks awful in comparison to this blog! Thank goodness I switched. I wish I'd done it sooner. 

I wish I'd let go of the things that made me unhappy.

Re: outfit photos, I wish I had just let go. When it stopped being fun, when it started making me look at myself and think, "gross," I wish I had just stopped. Why did I keep torturing myself?

I wish I'd known then what I know now about content marketing.

Really, seriously. I wish I'd been more aware of producing quality content, of writing good blogs, of having good social media. I wish I'd been more careful about what I wrote and how I wrote it. I've recently been reposting articles I wrote on my old blogs and reading some of the things I wrote--I'm just baffled about how I thought that was true! It's so odd to read your past self's thoughts. I'm sure I'll look back at this in 3 years and be like, "shut up, past Michelle." 

I wish I'd appreciated the community more. 

Sometimes I got really down on blogging and felt excluded from the community. But the fact is, when it comes to blogging, you make your own community, your own circle of friends. You might never be best friends with the "top tier" blogger you love--but you might make some of the best friends you've ever had if you just let go of that. 

My Favorite Podcasts

I recently started listening to podcasts at work and at home. Here's why: usually when I'm home with Forrest, I watch a lot of TV to fill the time. This is very much a Bad Thing. As Forrest gets older, I'm trying to turn the TV off more and more--which means I need some way to entertain my brain while he plays in the living room. Enter podcasts. They're absolutely perfect for road trips, working long hours writing, and, of course, filling the kitchen with sound as I clean and cook and make sure Forrest don't hit his head too hard. 

I thought I'd share my favorites. I'm not super discerning when I listen to podcasts, but here's a brief disclaimer: right now, I primarily listen to true crime podcasts. They're just my favorite kind. What can I say? I love TLC specials and the ID channel, and the new American Horror Story season is right up my alley. 

1. My Favorite Murder

When I started writing this list, I knew exactly which podcast would be number one--after that it's a grab bag. I love My Favorite Murder. It's hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark, two totally funny ladies with anxiety issues and a love for true crime stories. Sometimes, the idea of a "murder comedy" podcast can sound, um, gross. However, they aren't making fun of victims, but they do try to find humor in what is an interesting subject. They tell great stories, show compassion to victims, and make fun of murderers. What's not to love? They also donate proceeds of their t-shirt sales to End the Backlog, which is a cause I feel insanely passionate about. 

2. Lore

Lore took me a long time to get into, but once I started getting through episodes, I was hooked. Lore is hosted by Aaron Mahnke, who is a storyteller, ultimately. Some episodes of Lore have started and I've immediately thought, "This is such an old story! So boring!" But then at the end, he introduced a story about a legend I had never heard of. For example, in an episode about vampires, he told the story of the "first American vampire." 

3. In Sight

This is another true crime podcast, but it's very different from My Favorite Murder. It's hosted by two women, Ally and Charlie: Charlie is American and Ally is Australian. They discuss unsolved crimes and mysteries and provide their own insight (get it?), research, and theories. It sounds dull when written out like that, but episodes about the Jamison Family disappearance and murder, Talia Head, and the Villisca Ax Murders disappearance have me hooked. 

Email Etiquette for Responsible Adults

Email stresses me out, as I’ve written before. Sometimes, it’s hard to know what to say via email—and it’s really easy to say the wrong thing. Email can be written too seriously or too casually. And it’s very easy for email to slip through the cracks and—oops! It’s been 7 days and you didn’t reply to that super important email.

I spend a lot of time answering emails for both my work and personal life. I’ve found myself following a few rules over the last few years. Here they are—my simple email etiquette rules for responsible adults. 

1. Keep it Short

You get an email. You need to answer it. You have so much to say. You start typing—and keep typing… and keep typing… and keep typing. 

You’ve gone into overload. In your attempt to remain thorough, you’ve sent a novel in reply. And girl, ain’t nobody got time for a novel in their email!

This is my rule: I write 1 paragraph per email. That’s it! Some people set a 3 sentence maximum (and as a very, um, verbose person, I just can’t). I set my maximum at a paragraph of 5-8 sentences. That’s it: say what you need to say and sign off. If they need more details, they can ask you to clarify. 

2. Don’t reply in the heat of the moment. 

You’ve been working on an important project and you finally submit it, dust off your hands, and think—“ahh, a job well done.” And then, the email comes back. This needs changed, this needs fixed, this is all wrong, what were you thinking? 

You hit reply and start typing, in the heat of the moment, a reply that isn’t, well, very polite. You fire it off and immediately regret it. They’re the client; you’re not. Oops. 

If you get an email filled with criticism or rejection or just plain annoyance—let it rest. Flag it, put it in a folder, and return to it in 24 hours or however long you need to chill out. 

3. However, reply to anything important within 24 hours. 

Even if you’re mad about it, try to reply within 24 hours. That might be a full reply or it might be, “Just letting you know I saw this email, but I am swamped right now and will get to it Friday!” Just a note to let them know you’ll get back to them. 

It’s so easy to let mailboxes get stuffed full and to find yourself replying to email after 4 or 5 days of it languishing in your inbox. No matter how busy you are, think of that from the opposite side; say you sent an important email to someone you’re working with and they just didn’t reply for 5 days! You know how that feels? It feels crappy. 

4. Don’t reply-all to huge email chains. 

Please. Just don’t. 

Got an email etiquette tip you follow? Share with me on Twitter!
 

6 Tips for Surviving Internships

As you all remember, internships were my bread and butter for several months of my life after graduating college. At one point in time, I was working part-time at a grocery store deli and doing three (yes, three!) internships at once. It was exhausting. 

I learned a lot from doing internships and more than anything, I gained experience that made me seem invaluable to employers. With new graduates every year, there are a new league of unemployed and terrified graduates who have no idea what they are doing and no idea where to start. Hopefully, these tips can be a help to them. 

I'm certainly not an internship expert, but I do know a few things. These tips are for current students, new graduates, and anyone who is wanting to start a new career. 

1. Yes, you do need to do an internship or two. 

Or seven, in my case. In college, I did two substantial internships, but I was a rarity. A majority of the people I knew did one internship, or independent study, as they were considered the same thing. This, unfortunately, means there is a substantial portion of college students graduating with one three-month period of professional experience. That's... not great, guys. Do an internship; if you can, do two. If you really can, do more than two. Do as many as you can when you are in school and can afford it. An internship can be anything, really: writing articles on the side for a local publication, volunteering your services as a local animal shelter, or working the counter at a women's shelter. There are tons of internships out there that are not in offices. 

I realize this is hard for people who are paying for school, and housing, and everything else, entirely by themselves. You might feel you have to decide between part-time (or full-time) work or an internship: one benefits the now, one benefits the future. Which leads me to...

2. Do know that you'll have to make sacrifices. 

Something like 99% of internships are unpaid. And paid internships are basically like fighting a gladiator: the very, very lucky receive paid internships. That's not to say "don't apply for paid internships"; it's more of a "don't put all your eggs in one basket" life tip. 

If you need to work part-time, but you want to do internships to make sure you get a job after college (which, really, I hope that's why you're in college), know that you'll need to make sacrifices. This applies if you're a new graduate working a weird part-time job, as well. You'll basically be working over full-time, but only be paid for part of it. You'll be exhausted, but the experience is ultimately worth it.

One last note on this: I know this is an unfair and messed up system. But, here's the thing: it's easier to tear down a broken system from the inside. Once we're all the CEOs and leaders of the world, we can change this--and I'm 99% sure we will. For now, however, these are just the facts, as crappy as they are.  

3. Do know that you can use part-time job experience to impress employers. 

Do you worked through college, or the months after college, at a retail job, while doing internships? Don't tell potential employers you were just doing internships. Say the reality! "I was going to school full-time, working part-time at McDonald's, and then I did 3 internships in 6 months." Excuse me, but that's impressive. What did you learn working that hard? What did it make you realize? What skills did you gain (prioritizing, budgeting, time management)? These experiences can be used to your advantage. Don't be humble. Brag. 

4. Do know that you can consider blogging an internship or even a job.

I always include my blog on my resume. I always talked about what blogging and social media has taught me and how I could apply those skills to the job I was interviewing for. For this reason, keep your blog up: keep it professional and make it awesome. In short, make your hobby count for something and know how to talk about it, professionally, in interviews. 

5. Do know you can e-mail any business asking if they need interns. 

So, you can't find any local internship opportunities. What's stopping you from emailing local businesses to see what you can offer them? You're not asking for money. Ask if you can job shadow, or intern, for a week or two. Ask if you can at least meet them to talk. Mention why you're interested in interning for the company and what you hope to gain from it, and why only they can offer it. People love to feel special; make HR feel special when they receive that email. 

When I first graduated, I spent hours applying to jobs and emailing local businesses -- mostly PR and marketing firms, some publishing companies -- I wanted to work for. I heard back from some; I never heard back from others. But it was a way to introduce myself and set myself apart. If they do have job openings in the future, I can always slyly mention that I emailed them as a new graduate and how I'm still so excited to have the opportunity to work for them. Sneaky, huh? 

6. Don't think internships are magic job machines.

They're really not. I did seven internships after college and it still took me eight months to a get a job that didn't include orthopedic shoes. It took me another nearly two years until I got a job in my field. An internship is never going to magically get you a job; you'll still have to work for it, remain interesting, and interview well. And sometimes, the timing has to be just right.  

In short, when it comes down to it, internships are an important stepping stone for entering the real world; you can't ignore their importance, but they certainly aren't magic. Work hard, do your best, and no matter what, do things that will set you apart from the crowd, whether it's starting your own freelance business or managing an amazing blog.

2016 Blog Goals

It’s good to have goals. I love writing goals, but I have to be honest: my way of expressing my anxiety is to get really, really lazy. I find myself paralyzed by the fear that I will do badly, that I won’t meet my goal, and therefore, that I shouldn’t even try. I experience the static, hand-wringing kind of anxiety. Some people have to follow a schedule, have to complete tasks, have to always be working. My anxiety turns me into, essentially, a sloth. 

I’ve been planning a post for ages on my process of setting very small goals to break myself out of my anxiety and depression loop, but for now, a simple explanation is that I often choose one thing to do every week and then build on it. For example, a few weeks after I had Forrest, I set the goal that I would change my clothes every day; then the next week, if I succeeded, I would try to shower every day; and then the next week, if I succeeded in both of those goals, I would try to leave the house 2-3 times a week. This sounds like the lamest form of baby steps ever, but I find these kinds goals much easier to digest, personally. 

For my blog, you may have noticed that I’ve recently started posting a lot more. That was a goal I set for myself in August: I wanted to post every week day. Once August was done and I’d successfully kept up blogging every day (usually writing everything in advance the week before), I set the goal that in September, I would keep up a process of scheduling tweets alongside blog posts a week in advance. In October, my goal is to start cleaning up my Instagram feed (a process I’ve already somewhat started) to better promote my blog. 

To be completely transparent, I want to share my goals for the last few months of 2016, so that I, the anxiety sloth, can stay accountable. 

October

As I said, my goal for October to clean up my Instagram feed to better promote my blog. I will, obviously, still share photos of Forrest because he is my number 1 main man. However, I want to start posting, at most, 3 times a day, plus Instagram stories. Here’s my content plan for Instagram: 

• 0-1 Forrest post per day (this is entirely selfish & for my family) 
• 1 blog-related post per day
• 1 personal post per day (dinner, walking, thoughts, etc.) 

Hopefully, this will clean up my feed and allow my Instagram to be more than just a shrine to a baby named Forrest. 

November

I will share more about my goals for November later, but I’m going to be looking into switching from Squarespace to Wordpress. My Squarespace subscription renews in September, so I will keep Squarespace for at least another year. However, Squarespace is very expensive. Way more expensive than I really enjoy paying. That being said, Wordpress seems to be kind of a fight for me, especially with my insecure internet. I need to do some more research on the process. A breakdown of my goals for November: 

• Keep up blogging, Twitter, & Instagram schedule 
• Research Wordpress

December

My goal for December is entirely growth-based: I want to start sharing my posts on Pinterest more consistently and I want to see an increase in my traffic of at least 25%. I have a few ways that I want to do this, but they mostly include using my existing social media to better push traffic to my blog, participating in those Twitter chats that I know are important. 

January

Ok, not in 2016, but in January, I want to do something I’ve written about for a while now: I’m going to launch a newsletter. I’m going to change how I was originally going to do this, but I think it will work out really nicely. And hopefully, as my blog and brand grows, I can make positive changes in the direction I want to go. 

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I’ll be checking in on these goals periodically in the coming months. Keep my accountable, ok? 

How to: Stay Organized

I love being organized. I have a knack of being organized even in the middle of chaos: I know where everything is; I can remember each piece of clothing I own and Forrest owns; and even if everything is a mess, I can find everything. In a perfect world, my house would be as gorgeously organized as a fancy lifestyle blog. The reality is, sometimes that's not always practical. I have no own methods of staying organized. Here they are. 

1. Find Your Own Way. 

There is lots of advice out there for getting, and staying, organized. But the truth is--some of it won't work for you. Some of it will. And some of it, you might need to alter to make work. Don't worry about sticking to the way someone else does things. 

2. Throw Things Away

Throwing out things I don't need or use is the number one way I stay organized. At least once a week, I go through my kitchen and office and throw things away--junk mail, magazines, catalogues. One thing I often have to force myself to do is throw away notepads and notebooks that are just cluttering up my house and getting in the way. I like this checklist. 

3. Declutter

Put everything in its place. It's easy for stuff to pile up--my china cabinet in my kitchen is the most cluttered, awful space and, a piece of advice, don't open the drawer. Step number 1 for getting organized is decluttering: get things put away, put in bins, and organized and cleaned up. Get rid of anything you don't need. 

4. Start a filing system to clean up your important documents.

I used to keep everything in binders--but those rapidly take up space. Now that we have Forrest, a house, and two cars, I have all kinds of stuff I need to keep track of, especially of the paper variety. I use a simple, place filing cabinet, but I know soon I'll need to expand to something larger.